Yeah. He messaged me again today, with no apparent recollection of having done so before. Even with hints.
(4:45:00 pm)HumorlessRomeo:hi (redacted)
(4:48:29 pm)TheSnob:Hello.
(4:48:51 pm)HumorlessRomeo:are you alone this morning
(4:49:26 pm)TheSnob:It's afternoon for me.
(4:49:39 pm)HumorlessRomeo:even better
(4:49:54 pm)HumorlessRomeo:I'm looking for some sexy talk
(4:50:01 pm)HumorlessRomeo:you up for it?
(4:50:21 pm)TheSnob:I am not.
(4:50:41 pm)TheSnob:I'm a little proccupied.
(4:52:17 pm)HumorlessRomeo:can I help you with that?
(4:52:29 pm)HumorlessRomeo:perhaps you deserve a distraction
(4:52:33 pm)TheSnob:Perhaps; how are you at writing terrible poetry?
(4:52:43 pm)HumorlessRomeo:oh not bad
(4:53:37 pm)HumorlessRomeo:are you sure there isn't something else I can do for you?
(4:53:58 pm)TheSnob:I don't imagine so. Unless you offer dogsitting services.
(4:54:23 pm)HumorlessRomeo:you sure?
(4:54:36 pm)HumorlessRomeo:I have someone hear who'd lreally like it if you said yes
(4:54:54 pm)TheSnob:Quite sure.
(4:54:56 pm)HumorlessRomeo:he's hard to ignore
(4:55:06 pm)TheSnob:Is it Bobcat Goldthwait?
(4:55:22 pm)HumorlessRomeo:you could call it bob
(4:56:30 pm)TheSnob:He's very difficult to ignore. I'm not sure if it's the voice, or the stare, or both.
(4:56:54 pm)HumorlessRomeo:well my bob doesn't speak
(4:57:01 pm)HumorlessRomeo:but he does point
(4:57:05 pm)HumorlessRomeo:and poke
(4:57:08 pm)HumorlessRomeo:incessantly
(4:57:40 pm)TheSnob:That's rather rude; I would think your friend Bob's mother would have taught him better manners.
(4:57:51 pm)TheSnob:Oh, or is he an orphan? Or still a child?
(4:58:16 pm)HumorlessRomeo:he's an orphan
(4:58:24 pm)HumorlessRomeo:he needs a place to stay
(4:58:32 pm)HumorlessRomeo:preferably slippery
(4:59:44 pm)TheSnob:It's not usually a good idea to put orphan children in slippery places. They could fall and get hurt.
(4:59:51 pm)TheSnob:Emergency room visits are expensive.
(5:00:05 pm)TheSnob:And the stress incurred is terrible for the overall health of everyone involved.
(5:00:06 pm)HumorlessRomeo:yes they are
(5:00:31 pm)HumorlessRomeo:hmm
(5:01:13 pm)HumorlessRomeo:all he really wants is to make you feel good
(5:01:25 pm)TheSnob:I imagine you could find him a good home if you contact the local branch of CPS. They'll probably find Bob a foster home.
(5:01:46 pm)HumorlessRomeo:but what about you
(5:01:50 pm)TheSnob:Oh, that's sweet and sad. Looking for a sense of validation by providing a semblance of well-being to strangers.
(5:01:51 pm)HumorlessRomeo:and y our pleasure
(5:02:03 pm)TheSnob:Oh, I'm just fine. I'm not an orphan.
(5:03:56 pm)HumorlessRomeo:well bob likes you
(5:04:05 pm)HumorlessRomeo:he'd like to insert himself in you
(5:05:17 pm)HumorlessRomeo:although penetrate is better
(5:05:58 pm)HumorlessRomeo:brush against your sedxy lips
(5:06:10 pm)TheSnob:Oh dear me. Inverse birthing desire is usually indicative of deep-rooted maternal turmoil.
(5:06:30 pm)TheSnob:Penetrate me? That sounds rather stabby. I don't want to be stabbed. Or have my lips pierced.
(5:06:31 pm)HumorlessRomeo:yes
(5:06:43 pm)TheSnob:Isn't Bob the orphan a little young ot be a licensed piercer?
(5:06:58 pm)HumorlessRomeo:he's freelance
(5:07:26 pm)HumorlessRomeo:I think he's going to cum inside you
(5:07:44 pm)TheSnob:Even freelance piercers usually have to have some manner of licensing from the state board of health - although some states, as I recall, are more lax on that than others.
(5:08:05 pm)TheSnob:But I'm not a building. He can't come in.
(5:08:25 pm)HumorlessRomeo:he's in
(5:08:45 pm)TheSnob:In what? Oh, in custody of CPS? That was quick.
(5:09:07 pm)HumorlessRomeo:he's in your pussy
(5:09:14 pm)HumorlessRomeo:and oh he is throbbing
(5:10:01 pm)TheSnob:Oh no, my cat!
(5:10:16 pm)TheSnob:Hurting small animals is the first sign of a serial killer, you know!
(5:10:26 pm)TheSnob:You'd better get him taken in right away!
(5:10:36 pm)TheSnob:And now I have to go get my cat to the vet!
At this point I shut down and skedaddled (much as I would have liked to continue the (I hesitate to use the word) conversation, for personal amusement if nothing else) on my commute - but when I got home, it looks like he (*cough*) shot of a little more before my account disconnected.
(5:10:41 pm)HumorlessRomeo:yes
(5:10:47 pm)HumorlessRomeo:it will need to be cleaned
(5:10:55 pm)HumorlessRomeo:I'm afraid you've missed the show
(5:11:11 pm)HumorlessRomeo:bob is finished performing
(5:11:29 pm)HumorlessRomeo:but he appreciates your presence
And me without my basket of rotten fruit.
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